I feel like these posts mirror my life, and I do updated based on places I have been! Low and behold, the Dr’s office has some kooks!
1 ) Screaming Child- I feel like every Dr’s office has this, regardless if it is a pediatrician, a walk-in clinic, a hospital or an OB-GYN. A child is always screaming, tears are not a necessary, but loud decibles are. “IVE SEEN THIS MOVIE BEFORE AND I LOVED IT” – child today in Dr Office. Thank you for telling me, because I really care about the expansive list of movies you have seen.
2 ) ST-WHAT?!- I have seen a couple of these, well I judge, so I can only assume. When couples come together it is for moral support of something (pregnancies usually maybe some transmitted infection if they are close). You can tell they are a couple, by the amount of cuddles that happen on the chairs in the waiting room. OB-GYN is next door my friend, it is next door.
3 ) Let’s Get Physical- These are the people who come in once a year, and cannot be bothered by it. They come, impatiently wait an hour, freakout to reception that they’re behind (they would know it is common to be running behind if they came more than once a year). When they finally get in, they have like 45 minute appointments because every orphus needs to be checked. Who is running late now?
4 ) New Office Nerves- If you have ever switched offices you can empathize with the NON. The NON has just switched offices and are most likely uncomfortable. Their previous Dr either retired, or they are no longer a child (I went to my Ped Dr until I was 19). They can be seen asking a million questions.
5 ) Hypochondriac- Admit it. At one point in your life you were able to identify with the big H. Headache? Must be tumor. Stomach ache? Must be Celiac. Tingly feeling? Must be Stroke/Heart Attack. Although maybe not as severe as these assumptions, the H is on a first name basis with the receptionists, and gets blood taken at least once a month.
6 ) Chronic Cory- Now the CC you want to give kudos too, but you’re so grossed out you cant. They are the ones hacking in the waiting room, spreading their mystery illness. Either too busy to come earlier or refusal to call in sick from work, the CC is someone who has been sick for weeks, but is only coming now because they have been forced to.
7 ) Dr. Drug Me- Opiates.
8 ) Old- Old.
Sorry I bit the bullet on the last two descriptions. I didn’t feel the need to have more than one word describe them, because it is just so obvious!
You know the drill!