#4- The Airport

Ahhh, the Airport, a fabulous place that gets you from point A to point B, also a fabulous place to people watch.

1 ) This Means Business -(woman/man)- TMB, one of the most common types you will find in an airport. Always donned in a suit, with one black rolling carrying on, the TMB cannot be bothered for one second. The TMB will show up at the latest possible time to avoid lines, and is easily frustrated in the security line. Sitting in coach? Don’t even think about it!

2 ) Unattended Minor- The Unattended Minor is another type seen in the airport, usually alone and either going or coming from the grandparents house. The UM can be often seen with a Nintendo DS/ipod/electronic gadget, looking uninterested to its surroundings. Always accompanied by a flight attendant, who looks less than thrilled.

3 ) The New Traveler- The New Traveler (TNT) is, as expected, new to the whole traveling thing. TNT will show up to the airport more than 2 hours in advance, with passport etc most likely on one of those neck wallets. TNT will be seen asking 20 questions and over-enthused about being strip searched at security.

The Diva (otherwise known as J-Lo, Jenny From The Block)

The Diva (otherwise known as J-Lo, Jenny From The Block)

4 ) The Group- The Group can be broken down to either a school class, a sports team, or some sort of club. All in all, you don’t want The Group to check in the same line as you. They are loud and take FOREVER. Chaperoned by few, The Group asserts their independence by buying over-priced airport food, and take up all the seats at the gate…

5 ) The Diva- The Diva, celebrity or not, The Diva can be either female or male. The female version can be seen strutting around the airport in stilettos and skinny jeans, most likely wearing sunglasses, inside. The same can be said about the male diva, but trade the stilettos for bling. The Diva takes forever at security and takes 2 seats up at the gate (obviously their Marc Jacobs purse needs a spot of their own). If you’re lucky, they will travel with lapdog in tow.

6 ) The Family- The Family (my favourite of them all), might just be the loudest ones in the airport. If there is a mother, then she is most definitely stressed, and making sure the kids are a) not too loud b) occupied with their technology gadgets c) not lost. Along with that, the mother will do the check in, and ask a billion questions… all whilst being distracted by the children. The children, depending on their age, will a) be loud b) be occupied with technology gadgets c) ask “when are we leaving” and “can I buy some food” and d) will want to run around. The father (if there is one) will be too busy on his smart phone, or trying to find information on the latest game to care about the children’s whereabouts.

7 ) The Gapper- The Gapper, also known as the Traveler, Lost Soul, Recent Graduate, is someone who is going away for a long time. They will most likely have a backpack the size of their body on their back, and come rolling in with a goodbye crew. Anxious to leave, The Gapper will try and dodge all bullets to get through security.

8 ) Rowdy Retirees- The Rowdy Retirees (RR) are a fun bunch in the airport. Escaping from the cold to warm places, the RR’s have the biggest grins on their faces. Most likely wearing pastel colours or hawaiian print, the RR’s, although the friendliest of the bunch, will be the slowest of the bunch. Security will ask “Do you have any film in your cameras?” ….. WHY YES THEY DO!

9 ) First-Time-Flying-Together-Couple (idea suggested by Thomas Shannon write up by me 🙂 )- Everyone loves the FTFTC. Kisses before check in. Kisses after check in. Kisses before security. Kisses after security. Usually seen with their arms around each other, they are taking in that moment of going on their first trip alone together, and all of you lucky travellers get to see! Don’t feel obligated to take their picture when you see one of the FTFTC’s with their arm stretched out taking a picture of the two of them…kissing.

If I forgot any common types of airport attendees, comment and I will add it in and credit you!! enjoy!

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4 thoughts on “#4- The Airport

  1. I used to be TMB back in the day. I walked around like I owned the place flashing my first class boarding pass to all the peons sitting in coach. And if wasn’t upgraded that day someone at the gate was going to be looking for a new job. Thankfully I’ve mellowed out and haven’t flown for awhile to the point where Im almost a TNT again.

  2. Love it! So true, I however was a lost soul. I had the ticket and went to the monitors and it may as well have been in Hebrew. It was hopeless, and I asked for help like no less than 20 times. When I was in Chicago I barely made it to my next flight…It wasn’t my first flight but it was the biggest airport for me, so maybe I was like the country cousin…us simple country folk get overwhelmed by the pace, and the rudeness. I seriously wanted to cry and not be me so I could laugh at myself. 🙂 Good post, well done!

  3. Great post!! I think there is another category you can add to the list. The first-time-flying-together-couple…I’m sure you can come up with a great description for this!

  4. LOL! Love this post 🙂
    Yep, we are The Family. Although my kids are still young and haven’t yet been introduced to the Nintendo DSs – I see us working our way there. I usually breathe a sigh of relief when we get to our seats, then you see a 5 & 2-year-old who know more about how the on-board entertainment system works than I do.

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